This is why Timmy doesn’t want a bunny wabbit:


Don’t cry Timmy! Its the Easter Bunny! He comes EVERY year and hides things in the backyard!


Childhood trauma. Its a beautiful thing!

Its been blistering hot! Human ventured outside to sit with me, but she soon gave up and went back in. Maybe ole PINKY needs to grow a pair and deal with a little bit of heat! Maybe I should mentor her. Teach her feng shui. Paint. GROW A FRIGGIN GARDEN!

I have been hunting at night. Human found a woodpecker in the driveway. I was so proud of my accomplishment! Sadly, when I was let out in the morning, it was gone. I think Human ate it. What a fat pig.

You might be wondering why I am bashing her so much.


she is home more often. BUGGING ME. PESTERING ME. I don’t need her in my grill all the time! She’s IN MY BUBBLE! Hmph. Maybe if I ignore her she will take the hint and leave. Grandma knows better. She lets me have the living room all to myself. And she never stretches out on the carpet. Yeah, Human does that. She’s so rude. Like I said, I need to mentor her. Ugh. Why can’t I have a nice, well-trained person to cater to me? Sometimes I feel like I have to do all of the work around here.



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